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Cry Me A River Baby Mario

I was cryin’ just to get you
Now I’m dyin’ ’cause I let you
Do what you do – down on me.

I find it extremely annoying when professional athletes reduce themselves to whining little babies when things don’t go their way.  We have all seen the Miami Heat players argue every call ever made against them while they flop all over the court, and most of us can remember the Yankees Paul O’Neill cry every time a strike was called against him, but the way that Mario Williams acted after the Jets blowout yesterday takes the cake.  Williams was the most hyped Free Agent during the NFL offseason last year and when he signed with the lowly Buffalo Bills everyone thought he would be their savior.  People even went as far as saying that Buffalo had one of the best Defensive Lines in the NFL along with the New York Giants.  Well, after the Jets smacked the Bills on Sunday it seems as if people are changing their minds fast and instead of taking the loss like a man, Mario Williams acted like a punk with his babyish excuses.

Austin powers through super Mario.

After the Jets set a franchise record for most points on opening day (48), “Baby Mario” addressed the media and said the following, “”Pass blocking doesn’t consist of illegal hands to the face just about every play… You’re getting off the ball and getting punched in the face, literally — not by accident — just about every other time, and that’s a penalty, last time I checked, unless they changed it with the new CBA or something. Last time I checked, that’s a penalty.”  HAHAHAHA!  Are you kidding me?  Sure it’s easy to point fingers at the replacement refs and say that they are the reason for you failures, or you can man up and take responsibility for playing like a chump and getting shut down by a guy who has only started 2 games in his entire career.  The man that Baby Mario is claiming was putting “illegal hands on his face,” is the Jets new starting Right Tackle, Austin Howard.

1,000 words not needed.

When the preseason got underway, the Jets weakness was considered their offense and was primarily pointing the finger at the Right Tackle position for their inadequacies.   The Bills started the preseason with a newly built Defense lead by the $100 million man Baby Mario himself.  For the entire week leading up to opening day, all I heard was how Baby Mario and his teammates were going to eat Howard and the rest of the Jets O-Line alive.  I heard how Mark Sanchez was going to be hit so much that he would end up eating more grass than a stoned cow.  Well a stunning turn of events occurred and not only did Howard win the battle with Baby Mario, but the entire Jets O-Line gave Sanchez all day to throw and didn’t allow a sack.

Howard you feel if the spirit is Williams, but the flesh is weak?

After hearing Baby Mario’s comments, Howard replied with, “From what I saw from the film, and what I know from the game, the game is moving so fast and people are moving so fast you can’t purposely put your hands anywhere every single time. It’s impossible!  Me and him had really good battles last night and if he feels that way, I don’t know what to say about that. I didn’t see any flags or as much on the film either.”  I didn’t see any flags on you either Austin and I think you had a great and legal performance.  When Howard was named as the replacement for the awful Wayne Hunter, there was a lot of people, including myself, that had their doubts.  Well, after shutting down one of the best pass rushers in the game all day long, I think those doubts have been lifted.

The Jets pay their Bills on time.

The Bills have sucked for a long time and it seems as if they are going to continue with their pathetic ways, but with Baby Mario and his new excuse making habits, Buffalo has just earned an even worse reputation then they already had.  Hey, guess what Baby Mario, if someone was hitting me illegally in the face all day I would hit them back 10 times harder.  But instead of being a man, you chose to not complain all game about the “illegal hits,” and then once the blowout score was finalized you cried to the media like a baby without its bottle.  Baby Mario:  You are a 7-year veteran that is 6’6 and nearly 300 lbs, you just signed a 5-year $100 million contract and yet you have the audacity to whine to the media after a far more inferior player in Howard shut you down all game.

I’m over 200 years old and I could still beat Mario’s ass!

A smart man named Benjamin Franklin once said, “He that is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.”  So according to Benjamin Franklin, Baby Mario is good for nothing.  Don’t get me wrong, I understand Baby Mario’s frustration, but he should relax a little because he plays for Buffalo and no one really ever expects much from them.  One week into the season and Baby Mario is on pace to earn $1,250,000 per tackle he records over his 5-year contract with the Bills.  Good investment Buffalo!

One response

  1. Pingback: Man the F*** up!!! « Sports Debaters

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